Tuesday, May 30, 2017

Calgary Bound! And A Little Of My History

These are heading to Calgary!
© Nicki Ault, 2017

The truth is I don't always know what to say. I have no words when I receive an email from someone who wants to buy a painting. Well, I mean, I do have words. I know how to talk about pricing and shipping, and I certainly know how to say thank you. What I mean is, I do not know how to eloquently express what this support means to me. You see, for this there are no words. There are no words that express my gratitude to the extent that I feel it.

Ever since I won a Grover newsprint pad of paper from Ms. Eckert for a drawing contest in Grade One, I have loved art. I have wanted to make art. The actuality of that has ebbed and flowed through my life. The desire to create has always been there; the time, motivation, energy, support, finances and confidence have not. I clearly remember, as a struggling young adult, going to see a counselor at a woman's support office- I think it was called "Working For Women". I was sad, depressed even, feeling like I wanted to be at a different place in my life, but having no idea how to get there. At the time I had a university degree, I was working a job I liked but it was unrelated to my schooling and I didn't consider it a career, and I was making porcelain dolls as a hobby. My deep desire was to be an artist, but I was working a job that was so not an artist and when people asked me what I did I felt embarrassed to tell them because my heart wanted to be something other than that. I recall my counselor reframing my situation for me. She said, "if people ask you what you do, why don't you tell them you are an artist - it is true, you make and sell porcelain dolls in a gallery. That is what you do and WHO you are. Oh, and you also work this other job."

My mind was blown.

The restructuring of my thoughts at that moment was profound. I do not remember her name, but I have never forgotten her.

So, all these years later, when I receive an email from someone wanting to purchase a painting my heart literally jumps in my chest. Every time. I honestly feel moved that this is my reality. I have no words powerful enough in my vocabulary to say what that means to me. So, with these two paintings heading off to Calgary this week, all I have to offer is a thank you.

But you can bet it is from the very bottom of my heart.

10 comments:

Robyn Rennie said...

So wonderfully expressed, Nicki!

Tara Higgins said...

Couldn't agree with you more. The words that run around my head are 'they like me, they really like me.!' Even thought I know it's not me they are buying. It is so personal.

Sandra Busby said...

I can so relate to this feeling Nicki... In fact I could have written it myself! Your paintings look stunning, really they do and I am not at all surprised they have sold. Believe in yourself... You are a talented ARTIST!! I also have another job that pays the bills. It's completely unrelated to art and I don't enjoy it either... But in my heart I am first and foremost an Artist and the other job is just what I do to make a consistent wage.

Barbara Muir said...

How wonderful Nicki,

I completely understand and what totally breathtakingly beautiful paintings.

Congratulations. You are the real deal Nicki, one of Canada's greatest artists and I'm proud to know you.

XOXOXOXOXO Barbara

Dave said...

I am so proud of you Monica. To persue your dreams and have sucess is one of lifes greatest joys ( I am sure parenthood is up there as well but can't comment from experience. Unclehood is pretty cool but I can drop and run.) Ayn Rand said "The only measure of human value is how well we do our work"(or close enough) and you have always been an extremely valuable human to me and everyone around you. "Keep on keepin' on"- Clark Terry.
Very sincerely,
David Morgan

Nicki said...

Thank you Robyn!

Nicki said...

Hi Tara- yes! I have heard those words too. It is hard for it not to be personal. Thanks for your comment.
N.

Nicki said...

Thanks Sandra- that means a lot coming from a real artist like you! ;)

Nicki said...

Thank you dear Barbara, for your unwavering support!

XO N.

Nicki said...

David- thank you, sincerely and from the bottom of my heart. I really want to do my work well... someday I hope as well as you play the trumpet.

XOXO